Dead Men Do Tell Tales

My dear Lady Michiko,

Ever since that fateful day,  my heart has been stolen by you.  Even though I don't have a heart, Yohohoho!   I now know that I simply can't live any other way, even though I don't exactly live in the first place.  Yohohoho!  So my lady Michiko, will you Marry me?  I have this excellent engagement ring for you!  The man who sold it to me pointed out that if you ever get bored looking at it, you can even eat it!